Engagement Season is Here!

Did you know the holidays are one of the most - if not the most - popular times for getting engaged? What a perfect gift to give and to receive...an engagement ring!...But this post is not about the engagement ring, it is about the actual act of getting engaged. When he pops the question, what do you do first? Scream, yell, cry, call your mom, call your best friend? After you do that what do you do...post it on your blog, send an email...what is a girl to do?

Here is the scoop on engagement etiquette!

Do you need to a ring to be officially engaged?
A ring or a date is not necessary for your engagement to be considered official. This is quite simply a matter of him proposing. If he asks, and you accept, you are officially engaged. However….most people (i.e. your parents) will take it more seriously if there is some sort of ring involved (Just being honest here!)

Does my fiancé need to ask permission for my hand in marriage? 

For the most part, this custom is no longer applicable, but some men do still choose to follow with tradition. Ultimately you and he should really think about what your parents would prefer…it can simply be a sign of respect.

Does the ring have to have a diamond? 

Nope…anything will do, even a simple gold band. Don’t get caught up in what it is supposed to be, but rather what it means.

Does the ring really need to equal two months salary? 

First, see above question. Next, an engagement ring should not cost more than you and your future spouse can afford to spend. The price of the ring should be proportional to the size of your income.

How do we decide which set of parents to tell first? 

Traditionally the bride-to-be’s family is told first. The groom’s family is told next. Once this is done, the groom’s family contacts your parents. If your parents are divorced, his parents should call the parent who raised you, and then call the other parent later if the two of you are still close. As a side note, if one of you has children, tell them right away. You have no obligation to tell an ex-spouse right away…unless there are children involved.

My parents are divorced. Whom should I tell first?

If you still live with a parent, they should be the first to know. Otherwise, whichever parent raised you or you are the closest to should be told first. However (there is almost always a “however”) if say your parents are divorced and your Dad loves your fiancé, but your mom, who raised you, doesn’t…all bets are off…I’d tell Dad first!

So, that said....do you have a good engagement story?

Who did you tell first and how did you tell them?

My hubby proposed on Christmas morning. I called all my closest friends and my husbands family first (he called them) because we were going to see my parents later in the day...they didn't expect it...I didn't expect it...and we wanted to see the looks on their faces.

So what happened...we walked in wished everyone a Merry Christmas, gave hugs, kisses, helped in the kitchen....nothing. My brother walks in looks at me, and says "Dude, there is a ring on your finger!"  My mom was speechless...in a good way!

Want to know more about etiquette....Buy the book!